Can Weight-Loss Make You Happier?

As I sit here, in my cozy candle-lit home…

Fireplace crackling…

Ryan Adam’s version of Wonderwall playing in the background…

Typing away… while taking breaks to snack on my Lily’s chocolate, *of course*… 

I find myself in an *extremely* content and happy place.





My version of pure.bliss.

To be honest, October through December, I rarely had these moments.

I was greatly consumed with “the busy” of the seasons…

Drinking almost daily due to HABITnot dependency

And eating foods that kept me at a *constant* state of uncomfortably full.

I had very little discipline around food and alcohol, lacked confidence, struggled to focus, and had low energy.

Not surprisingly so… 

I also had very little inspiration and motivation to do the things that bring me joy…

Such as writing, learning, coaching, and working on my business.

Although all month long, I’ve complained about Keto…

And have been reminded *repeatedly* of why I do not follow restrictive diets anymore…

I have also felt extremely certain of my goals, visions, and where I’m heading.

This certainty has brought me a kind of happiness and joy I haven’t felt in a long time.

So, the age-old question…

“Can weight-loss TRULY make you “happier”?

Well, probably not “weight-loss” on its own…

But the journey, My Friends…

The commitment, the vision, the discipline, the successes, the realizations, the confidence, the energy boost, the overall feelings of wellness…

*THAT*, 100%, can have you feeling oodles of happiness.

There is something incredibly powerful about having a clearly-defined goal…

A vision…

And knowing where you’re heading.

That in and of itself can greatly improve the quality of your life.

Having a goal and staying committed gives us purpose in those auto-pilot days we tend to lead…

And reaching those goals… feeling that accomplishment…

Reminds us that we’re capable.

It’s life-giving! 

Now obviously… we can never guarantee we’ll reach our weight-loss goals…

And the number itself should never be the determining factor of our overall happiness.

But knowing we’ve committed to something to better our health and wellness…

Something that will keep those joyful and energizing vibes flowing…

There is nothing like THAT feeling.

If something is on your heart…

And it won’t leave…

Believe that it’s there for a reason.

It may be time to go after it.

You deserve to be happy.

Believing in us. 

2023 – My Year of Discipline

Prior to finding out I was pregnant with my 3rd kiddo five years ago, I was in a great place… physically, mentally, and spiritually.

I was waking up bright and early…

Getting in my workouts.

Being extremely mindful of what I was putting into my body, and making sure that it mostly had me feeling energetic, productive, happy, patient, and strong. 

I was a happy and present mama to my two young kiddos. 

I was soaking up all the personal development and yes, for me, that includes God time. 

Guys… I was even meditating. 

I mean, sheesh! 

I was in “the zone”… and it felt really good.

After seeing that positive pregnancy test… 

I had two thoughts…

One, I was overjoyed.

We tried with the hopes it would happen quick if it were meant to be, and wa-lah…. within the first month…


The second thought that followed… 

“Well, there goes all that work!”

If you’re like me, getting to a place where “healthy” becomes a habit isn’t easy.

It doesn’t come natural.

It take’s time, effort, and insane amounts of *discipline*.

Since having L, I’ve struggled greatly at finding “that place” again.

Sure, I could blame it on having three young kids, always being on-the-go, COVID, the fact that I was over “diets” and scales and went “intuitive” for a solid year, moving states last year… adjusting to all the change… our 10-year anniversary cruise, or a scary family moment that flipped my world… 

But the truth is, after having all three of my kiddos, I never got back to that committed, dedicated, truly determined no matter what version of myself.

Sure, for a time or two here and there, but there was always a deadline.

An endpoint.

I do best with A PLAN…

An ONGOING plan.

I THRIVE in routine and structure.

I love being educated in health and wellness…

And I am passionate about being a product of what I preach. 

This is why, Friends…

I have deemed 2023 my year of discipline!

This is my year of getting back to self-control…

Of saying no to things I MAY WANT in the moment…

KNOWING I’ll be better for having turned em down. 

This year is about staying true to the state of mind I’m in as I write this blog post, even though I know, come a future moment, my mood will be screaming a different tune.

The hubs and I are starting out the year with a DRY & KETO January.

Alcohol, although lovely at times, is never necessary…

And my body without a doubt responds well to the KETO & Low Carb lifestyle. 

Sure, there will be times this all SUCKS.

No doubt.

But just like strength-training a muscle…

Every time I prioritize sleep over a late night…

Every time I get my booty into that workout space…

Every time I turn something down in the name of health and wellness…

I’m strengthening that discipline muscle…

And am that much stronger for it. 

No, this doesn’t mean I’m never indulging again… 

But it does mean I will be mindful when I do. 

It means that I’ll be searching for, and eventually relishing in, the joys in things that involve more than booze, food, and delicious treats.

Because Friends… they’re out there! 

I am SO ready to get back to THAT version of me…

And I’m ready to do what it takes! 

I hope and pray you all are able to get a little closer to your true selves in 2023.

Life is way too short and unpredictable to wait any longer. 

Wishing you all a happy and healthy 2023!

Stay tuned! 

The Power of Passion & Action!

If you have been following me for a while now, you are aware that for about 20 years of my life, I yo-yo dieted.

This yo-yo dieting had nothing to do with passion, knowledge, or health.

The driving force was simply to lose weight, and be thin. 

In 2015 after having my middle daughter, I decided I was ready for a REAL change, and I became a member of a rather well-known company, and experienced some incredible physical results by being an active member of an accountability group, and by following a very specific plan.

Simultaneously, I started coaching groups, and oh my goodness…

A passion was born!

This was in fact the first time I was truly doing something not only in the name of being skinny, but in order to be healthy as well.

Something felt very right about this.

The problem however, was that I was still following “a plan”, and coaching to that specific plan.

Even 7 years ago, while in a very different headspace than I am now, I knew something didn’t feel right to me about expecting everyone to follow and do the same thing.

So I started to allow anyone into my groups for free, in order to provide people with the oh-so-powerful accountability.

Although I had come a long way from my days of starvation, I still struggled quite a bit with disordered eating, and my terribly unhealthy relationship with the scale.

Between 2015 and 2021, I continued to do several different “fad diets”.  

Although some of them worked well and taught me a lot…

They were still restrictive…

And I was yet to deal with what I believe to be NUMBER ONE in true ongoing success…


I have always been top-notch at following rules…

But I had no idea how to “do health” without a very strict and clear plan…

And I had no idea how to assess success without seeing numbers go down on the scale.

In 2021, I hit a wall, and decided to SCREW ALL DIETS, and went rogue. 

I called it Intuitive Eating.

Yet for MONTHS… over a year… I just basically ate everything, whenever I wanted.

Ironically, in that same timeframe, I decided to *certify* my coaching and make it official.

I poured wellness podcasts into my ears every morning.

I devoured all the personal development books.

And I definitely felt a huge mental and emotional shift.

I was actually learning a lot about myself and how I viewed food, weight, and health.

I accepted health isn’t all about how small you are or what you are or aren’t eating, and I realized the following:

  • Coaching others filled my cup so much it was overflowing.
  • I am a MUCH better coach when I am being true to myself and what I believe.
  • There is a research study to back up pretty much anything.
  • YOU MUST learn your own body and trust your gut.
  • A coach or some version of accountability is key to success.
  • The path to ongoing success is twofold, and includes a solid, measureable plan… and a strong and positive mindset.

I spent months (and a lot of money) on a variety of books related to all things health and wellness.

Different diets, various ways to eat, hormones, eating for your body type… you name it!

I found all of this material extremely fascinating, but the thing was…

As I read and acquired all this knowledge, I continued gaining weight.

Something happened to me one morning about a month ago where I realized…

Knowledge is wonderful, but it is not going to help me reach ultimate health…

And it’s not going to make me the best coach I can be.


Friends, I have not felt this “in my zone”, this “authentic” in both my life and my coaching… in over 2 years.

I cannot express enough the importance of experimenting, exploring, observing, and reflecting your ways in order to truly discover what works best for YOU, *your body*, and *your mind*, in THIS SEASON of life.

And then… taking action.

The seasons will change.

There will always be more knowledge.

There will always be more studies.

There will always be someone telling you what you should or shouldn’t be doing.

But only you know you.

You are the ultimate expert of your body and what it needs to feel amazing.

I promise, if you listen to your gut…

Find an amazing coach and/or accountability group…


If you keep going EVEN if you didn’t lose weight that week…

Even if you had a bad day…

Even if IT IS HARD… and Friends, it will be!…

You WILL reach a place you never thought possible.

And you will feel an immense amount of gratitude for your body, your mind, and your life.

Follow what you’re passionate about…

Allow it to resonate…

And takeaction

The rest will follow.

Believing in you.

The Scale and The Critter Brain

Today marks Day 7 since I’ve *intentionally* embarked on my weight-loss journey.

This past week, I’ve been weighing myself every morning, right after I wake up.

Yes! I know.

This is TOTALLY new for me, and is something that has taken GREAT amounts of reflecting, journaling, and questioning for me to be able to do.

So, why in the world am I doing this!?

Two Reasons:

  1. I’m utilizing the results as an assessment tool
  2. I’m practicing having a truly healthy mindset in regards to the scale

My past has taught me that like most things in life, avoidance is not the answer.

Healing has taught me that my mindset, not the physical scale, has been the problem.

By stepping on the scale daily, I am pushing myself to *accept* that in real life, no human loses weight every day… and yet *somehow*, we can still be successful, on point, and healthy!

That’s right!

The number on the scale does not dictate our worth, our ultimate success, and should never be the leading factor of our mood for the day and/or week.

This past week, I noticed the numbers going down rather fast on the scale… which Friends, is totally normal in the first week.

I am certain quite a bit of this was simply carb stores, protein, and water…

But, in any case, it was exciting and encouraging to see.

This weekend, the numbers increased the slightest bit Saturday morning, and remained the same today.

I mean, what the heck SCALE?! I’ve been on point for A WHOLE WEEK

Why haven’t I lost my 30 pounds yet?! 😉

I would be lying if I said this didn’t get my critter brain a little concerned after dropping a good amount of weight, every day, five days in a row.

I mean, here I am, a health and life coach whom people confide in and trust to help them make changes…

Publicly sharing with whomever out there chooses to read this that I am on this journey of weight-loss…

One in which I AM SURE will be a success…

And yeah, when I see those numbers go up or not budge…

It does make my brain wonder the typical human things…

What the heck am I doing?

I’ve never become truly healthy without a strict plan before.

Why would this even work?

Does this thinking sound familiar to anyone else?

Now, this is where many of us disordered eaters make a mistake… myself included.

We decide to change everything!



Friends, this is not the answer. And we ARE NOT doing that this time around.

Especially after only seven days of trying something different.

Our weight will fluctuate for multiple reasons.

We may need to go to the bathroom…

Ladies, we may be on our cycle…

We may be extremely stressed or had a stressful day…

And just maybe… our bodies are simply adjusting.

Beautiful People… if you hear nothing else here, HEAR THIS

DO NOT… I repeat… DO NOT change up your plan only a week into what you are doing.

Your body is changing, it is adjusting, and it requires *consistency* and *dedication* before it can assimilate the changes you’re attempting to make.

This can take several weeksespecially if you’ve been practicing some rather poor habits for months or years.

It can take up to a month or two to notice a change in how your clothes are fitting.

So I ask you, why would we expect the numbers on the scale to show us anything sooner?

Your body is healing.

Your mind is healing.

Give it permisson to heal.

Some great questions to ask yourself while on your journey are the following:

  • How do I feel?
  • How is my energy?
  • Am I satiated?

These answers will guide you much better than the numbers on the scale in regards to how healthy you are becoming, and how well your way of eating… YOUR DIET… is working for you.

So friends, if you are utilizing that scale… let’s all remember…

It is to be used as an assessment tool, but it is not the be all, end all when it comes to deciding how well our plans are working.

Calm the critter brain, remain consistent, and continue on your journey.

If you remain consistent, not only will the results come…

But the true healing will come as well.

Believing in you.

Believing in me.

Time for Mama to Make a Change!

In April of 2021, I embarked on an “Intuitive Eating” journey.

This meant that I stopped using the scale, and swore off diets “for good”.

What does that even mean, exactly?!  Don’t we all have a diet?! A way in which we eat?!

For about 2 months, eating whatever I wanted without having to worry about how the foods were affecting me numerically felt both freeing and exhilarating.

The 14 months that have followed however, have had me feeling totally lost.

As a health and life coach, I am regularly encouraging clients, family, and friends to experiment with various foods and ways of eating, and observe what resonates best for them. 

After all, we are all very unique beings, and all of us need something a little different.

And yet, I personally have been spending MONTHS avoiding a path which I KNOW will lead me back to both my well-being and true self, because of fear of judgement for wanting to lose weight.

When did it become so taboo to be concerned about our weight, health, and overall wellness!?

I know the idea of “Intuitive Eating” is intended for good… and in all honesty, IE has taught me A LOT about myself and the way in which I view food and my body.

It has also, however, led me to a great deal of weight gain.

When I stepped on the scale prior to having surgery on my knee August 10th, my jaw literally dropped.

I have never in my life seen that number on the scale.

Now Friends, if I were taking care of myself, nourishing my body with good quality foods and drinks, this number may have been easier to swallow.

But alas, I am not. And this was a HUGE wake up call for me.

Seeing as though I have felt lost for over a year in terms of my own health and wellness, realizing just how much weight I’ve gained since embarking on this “Intuitive Eating” journey, and still believing GREATLY in the fact that the greater the circumference of your waist, the higher your risk of heart disease and Type 2 Diabetes, I have never felt more certain that it’s time for this mama to make a change.

I’ve researched, I’ve planned, I’ve weighed, I’ve measured.

So, what’s my plan!?

Through MUCH reflection and journaling, through experimenting and observing, through utilizing my very own coaching tools; I have learned what energizes my body most, has me feeling most satiated, simmers down the anxiety, and has me feeling my best.

My goal at this point is to lose 30 pounds, and get my waist circumference back down to a minimum of 35 inches by Christmas.  

Although it’s a shame my health has suffered, in a way, I’m thankful that you’re all going to be able to witness my journey in real time via Facebook and my Pacifythechaos handle on Instagram.

By doing this, you will be able to see first hand the importance of the following:

  1. Proclaiming your plans loud and proud
  2. The power of a coach and/or accountability group in which you are active
  3. Having clear goals and objectives that are measurable
  4. Taking the time to learn and understand your body and what works best FOR YOU
  5. Preparation 
  6. Consistency

I plan to be completely vulnerable, and share it all!

The good, the bad; the triumphs and the struggles.

Something I especially look forward to sharing with you all is the inevitable self-sabotage that presents itself from time to time, how I do (or don’t) handle that sabotage, and what can be learned from those moments of struggle.

It has taken me some time, but I finally TRULY believe the following:

Following a “diet” is not bad. We all do it. We all have one.

Having a plan is not bad.  Many of us are better for it.

Losing weight, to improve our health and well-being, is not bad.  It’s actually wise.

For anyone who is in a similar boat, and is ready to make a change for their health, I hope and pray my commitment to my true self and my journey motivates and inspires you. Feel free to join along!

And of course, if you feel it would be helpful to have a coach alongside you as you embark on your health journey, you know where to find me! 

Cheers to accountability, good health, and the resources and ability to achieve it! 

Stay tuned! 

So, I’m in “A Place”.

On June 31st, I injured my right knee during a workout.

I didn’t stop. I kept going.

In hindsight, definitely should have stopped.

THEN, not only did I not stop, I decided to play tag with my kids.

THAT is where I REALLY did it!

For the past few weeks, I haven’t really been able to exercise, at least not in the way that gives me all those good “after workout” feels.

Now, working out is THE WAY I manage my anxiety and stress.

I am literally a different human when I workout daily…

And, I’m a different human when I don’t.

Being unable to workout has put me in a rather “blah” space.

Ironinically, days before this injury took place, I spent quite a bit of money on material related to strength-training, hormones, and ways of eating in order to do a deep-dive research into what makes us feel strongest and our best.

Instead, I find myself having zero interest in deep-diving, consuming WAY too much coffee, and opting for unhealthy food and drink options because they’re giving me that endorphin rush I’m craving, and am currently unable to reach with exercise!

Life, right?

Now, why in the world would I share this information as a health coach!?

I’ll tell you why.

FOR YEARS, entering “this place” had me seeing myself as a failure.

I saw it as yet another screw up that would last forever…

I saw myself needing to “start over again”…

And I felt as though I put in all this “hard work”… for nothing.

I truly believe a HUGE mistake we make, especially those of us with a history of disordered eating (not eating disorders), is one in which we make a change, and expect to NEVER STRAY FROM IT AGAIN!

To remainly *perfectly* on point… forever and ever.

Friends, this expectation is unrealistic, and will have you experiencing a lifetime of disappointment.

If you are like me, and have a history of disordered eating; binging… emotional… skipping meals… fad diets… etc…

There’s a GREAT chance you’ll see that place again from time to time.

I surely do.

And sincerely, I believe I’m better off for EXPECTING it.

It’s almost like having a 2-year old… and expecting them to act like a business man when out at dinner with the fam.

It’s not going to happen.

Expect them to act like a 2-year old, and you’ll be a lot less stressed when they do.

What’s truly important, is that we become aware!

That we learn and know our triggers.

Although these experiences are far from fun, when we know our triggers, we can become more proactive.

Even if we give in for a day, or two, or a couple weeks… chances are good your “blah” feelings will be short-lived each and every time you experience them.

I highly dislike being in this place.

It’s icky, uncomfortable, and doesn’t feel good AT ALL.

I LOVE to move, be busy, be silly and playful with my kids, be my inspirational self…

And with being forced to slow down, it has me feeling very lost.

Through my awareness, however; I am able to recognize the trigger in all of this is being unable to exercise, I am able to accept that this all is temporary, and I’m able to realize all of these feelings and behaviors I’m currently partaking in will be short-lived.

I know this, because I’ve been here before, and I have proven to myself that I CAN overcome it.

So, how do I overcome?

What’s next?!

How do I get out of “this place”?

Number 1… I PRAY.

Prayer has a way of magically coming to my rescue EVERY TIME I get back in “this place”. I’m talking sincere, deep from the heart, specific prayer.

God always comes through.

Number 2… I choose TWO things to tackle each day that are more in line with who I am and want to be.

Most likely food prep, and some kind of personal development or inspirational podcast.

Number 3… I commit to 10-minute daily meditations.

These help me greatly with my stress and anxiety, and I trust they will be a great alternative to my physical exercise at this time.

So… Beautiful People…

Please know…

It’s OK to be in a “blah” place.

It’s OK to *feel* ALL the feelings.

It’s OK to take a *temporary* step or two back from where you want to be.

What’s important is that after you’ve experienced “the blah”, felt the feels, and partaken in whatever brings you that *in the moment* temporary joy…

You make the decision to have a plan to get yourself back to being YOU.

The YOU that has you feeling your best.

The YOU that allows you to live your best life.

Believing in YOU,

Believing in me.

What We Say VS What We Mean

As parents, teachers, and caregivers, it’s easy to reach levels of frustration quickly with our kiddos.

Sometimes, this comes from a place of wanting the best for our kids…

Sometimes it comes from wanting to keep them safe…

And if we’re being truly honest here…

Sometimes, it comes from lack of clarity and attention on OUR part…


Until all hell breaks loose, and we lose it… often times, from embarassment.

While near the water play area at the children’s museum yesterday, a parent drew quite a bit of attention by pulling her young child close and yelling…


Now, I totally feel this…

We’ve all reached overload as caregivers, and I sympathize.


Is the kiddo really going to fall and get hurt because they’re not listening to mom?


They’re going to fall and maybe get hurt because there is a slippery wet floor, and they’re going too fast.

Now, the point of this is not to pick on this parent…

She could very well be a lovely mom who was having a rough day.

It happens.

The point however, is to become more aware of how we are as caregivers with our sweet kids, and what we’re REALLY trying to say VS what sometimes comes out.

With kids, we must be clear and specific with what we want them to do.

(Heck, this helps in marriages, too ;)).

We so often ASSUME our young kiddos “just know”…

But let’s ASSUME that they don’t.

A good reminder never hurts, right?

Instead, from the get-go… have a conversation…

“Do you see that water on the floor? It’s slippery… and if we go too fast, we could slip and fall. What do you think we should do to make sure we don’t fall and get hurt?”

Ask questions. Elicit discussion. Let the kiddos think!

When we approach these situations with compassion and curiosity, and when the solutions come from our kiddos, they will be much more likely to stay safe, and “listen” in the future.

They’ll have made that connection that water can be slippery… and when we aren’t careful… we could fall and get hurt... therefore, slowing themselves down without us saying a word anytime they see water on the floor.


Now, is there a possibility this parent had already had “the conversation” prior to this occurrence, and the kiddo is still not being cautious?


In that case, maybe it’s time for a calm and clear warning, and if that doesn’t work, time to move on to something else.

Moving on after a warning is another effective way to help kids second guess their actions in the future.

If you want the best in any situation; be clear, be specific, be consistent, and follow through.

I promise if you do this, your kiddos will catch on sooner rather than later…

And it’ll cause YOU a lot less stress and work in the long run.

Reelin’ It In!

One of the reasons I’ve been able to maintain a “healthier” way of living, post my YEARS of binge and emotional eating, is because I’ve truly learned to recognize and identify my triggers.

SUMMER is one of them.

If you’re an emotional eater, you’ll know…

You don’t have to be SAD to eat.  

We simply associate times, events, or occasions with FOOD…

And that FOOD brings us *all* the joys, happiness, and memories of those times.

We are now in the third week of summer break, and let me tell you…

I am WELL aware because of my actions.

Suddenly, I’m indulging with the kiddos in more ice cream treats… because it’s summer!

I’m eating out more… because it’s summer!

“Special Sunday Breakfasts” (pancakes and the works) are served more often… because it’s summer!

I am partaking more often in adult beverages… because it’s summer!

Now, all of this is fine on occasion, but what’s important is NOTICING and BEING AWARE of what we’re doing.

Ilana Muhlstein, dietician and creator of 2B Mindset has always resonated with me.

Anytime I need to “reel it in”, I find myself going back to the principles she promotes:

Water first, veggies most.

I also love her “plate it” methods for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

They give you an incredible visual of HOW your plates should look, in order to give you the right amount of filling, satisfying, and energy-giving meals depending on the time of day.

Whenever I start prioritizing my water and including more veggies, not only am I MORE FULL, but I also FEEL better.

This morning, I toasted a couple slices of Ezekiel toast to give me 50% fiber-filled carbs for sustained energy throughout the morning…

And to keep me full and satisfied… some scrambled eggs with lots of good veggies; mushrooms, onions, red bell pepper, and spinach, and I added half a slice of good quality american cheese as an “accessory”.  

Let me tell you…

For me personally, I find this delicious, satisfying, and it just.feels.right.

Now, although the majority of making adjustments is to feel my best…

I’d be lying if I said this had nothing to do with my weight.

Although I still do not step on scales, I do use my clothes as an assessment tool, and when they barely fit only a few weeks into summer, that concerns me.

I am ALL about enjoying the heck out of summer (and yes, sometimes that includes ice cream, food on-the-go, and summer cocktails)… but I am also all about having the ENERGY and HEALTH to keep me going with my three young kiddos!… and helping THEM realize that there is a lot more to summer than food!

Let us enjoy our summer, enjoy indulgences in moderation, but if you start to notice your energy and mood slipping…

Do yourself a great service by taking a look at your actions, becoming aware of what you are doing, and adjusting to what typically helps YOU feel your best.

Awareness is a great teacher, and it will help you to fully LIVE and ENJOY your summer with those beautiful kiddos! 

Rides & Funnel Cakes

Last weekend, after months of discussing Six Flags Theme Park and watching videos of real-time roller coaster riders, my husband and I took our three young kiddos; ages 8, 6, and 3 for the experience of their lives.

The day was honestly fabulous.

The weather was perfect, it wasn’t too crowded, the lines were relatively short, and for the most part, the kids were game for pretty much any and everything they could get on.

Now, prior to going, I mentioned to my kids the incredible (and oh so healthy), funnel cake sundaes I remembered having there over 20 years ago when I’d go with my family and friends, and for whatever reason, this got stuck in their heads as something that just HAD to happen while we were there.

After about 7 hours at the theme park…

YES, long day indeed…

The kids and I hopped off our last roller coaster and headed to meet my youngest and their dad.

As I knew they would, my 8 and 6 year old reminded me of the legendary funnel cake.

I told the kids IF we came across a funnel cake window, I’d stop… but only IF.

Well, of course we did.

Now, to my surprise, this funnel cake line was quickly becoming our longest line of the day, and… we were keeping my husband and smallest waiting.

After informing my kids we’d wait five more minutes, the line didn’t move.

I apologized, assured them we’d get one another time, and we continued on our way.

Well, if you have kids in your life… you can imagine how this went.

Immediately, my son went into super funk mode.

I’m pretty sure he was tearing up, and wouldn’t look at me.

He kept saying, “I guess we’ll never get one ever, then.”…

And just to be clear, this is a way he tends to deal with disappointment.


He wouldn’t talk much on the way home, he continually mentioned not getting funnel cake, and when asked about the day, he just kinda hemmed and hawed.

As I tucked him in that night, and asked…

“So what do you think? Did we have a fun day!?”

He said…

“Well, we didn’t get funnel cake. And that kinda ruined the entire day.”

I’ll let you take a breath for a second, I know I had to.

I told him I was sorry to hear that, gave him a kiss, and left the room.

Now, I am human…

My initial thoughts were…

Are you KIDDING me!? After planning, hours of driving, lots of $$$, and over 7 hours of walking and riding, your beloved Six Flags experience has been ruined because you didn’t get a fried ice cream treat!?

I breathed, I prayed, and I thought.

Almost instantly, I was reminded of how typical this is for us adults.

We can have the most PERFECT day, but if one thing doesn’t happen, one negative comment is spoke, or one unfortunate situation occurs, THAT is where our focus goes, and our entire day is ruined.

Realizing that… something I myself have been guilty of many a time…

I had to ask myself why in the world I’d expect my 8 year old kiddo to handle the situation any differently?

Now, I could have responded in the moment.

I could have pointed out all we did and how lucky he is…

I could have said he should stop this and be more grateful.

But I refrained, because that would have just made the situation even worse, AND… when we do that as parents, we’re basically telling our kids their feelings are no good, and they shouldn’t feel that way.

No one can be told how to feel.

Not kids.

Not adults.

It’s SO crucial that from a young age, we allow our kids to FEEL what they are feeling, and validate them.

Scientifically, it has been suggested that kids who are allowed to feel things like sadness, depression, anger, and disappointment have fewer mood disorders than those who are encouraged to suppress those feelings and put on a happy face.

Makes sense to me.

This is also a great opportunity for kids to learn that yeah, sometimes things don’t go as planned, and they DO feel bad, and that’s OKAY.

What a great opportunity for an open discussion on all the things that did go well.

Now, I’m happy to report that as the days have moved on, we have talked LOADS about all the amazing rides we rode, my son pointed out the theme park was better than his Nintendo Switch (wha?!) , AND… he’s only mentioned funnel cake ONCE in 4 days.

In the moment, the lack of funnel cake ruined his day…

But it is clear that by reminiscing about all the big coasters he was able to ride…

The experience overall was a POSITIVE one that he’ll remember for life.

Goodbye Diets! Hello, Experiments!

It’s crazy to think that only a little over a year ago now, I was still stuck on the diet roller-coaster!

After 20+ years of dieting, in April of 2021, I became intrigued by the idea of “Intuitive Eating”.

It was at that moment, that I decided to not only stop dieting, but to say, “Sayonara!”, to the scale as well.

HUGE moment in my life.

There’s something very terrifying about deciding to “listen to your body” when all you’ve ever done is follow an eating plan, or binge.

What does that even mean…

“Listen to your body?!”

For the first few months, I basically ate whatever I wanted.

Fast food for lunch?


Marble Slab every day?


All the chocolate!?


This all seemed too good to be true, and honestly, it made me truly happy to be partaking in foods I actually ENJOYED eating.

After following meal plans forever, I honestly didn’t even know which foods I actually liked anymore.

Now, this little thing I had going was fine for a while, until I started to feel rather crappy.

Who knew that using fast food, ice cream, and chocolate as fuel could only get you so far?!

Now, this is typically how Intuitive Eating goes, especially if you’re a dieter.

When you’re finally able to freely eat all those “taboo” foods that have been restricted for so long, it feels glorious, and you want them all.

However, once you realize you’re not feeling so hot, you then adjust to “listening” to your body.

Well, what I did… was go back to what I call… “Restricted Intuitive Eating”.

Now, if you’re thinking…

“What?!  THAT doesn’t sound intuitive at all!”…

You’re correct.

I found myself trying to CONTROL my “intuition”. 

This basically went on for the entire year, and was QUITE a journey.

Although difficult, frustrating, and emotional, I learned a ton from the process, and can honestly say I broke myself of 20+ years of dieting which let me tell you…

I never thought would happen.

I also learned how much easier it is to listen to my body when a scale is out of the equation.

There’s something so wonderfully satisfying about truly ENJOYING your food, and not wondering or worrying about how it will affect your weigh-in day… come Thursday.

Fast forward to the end of April 2022 where I decided to embark on a gluten-free experiment.

Now, YES…

Diets, no more!

“Experiments” however, I’m surprisingly OK with, and I actually encourage people to do them!

There is something comforting about an “experiment”.

When experimenting, you go at it as though you’re a scientist trying to find a solution to a problem. 

There’s a timeframe and an end date.

You’re not gluten-free FOREVER.  You’re gluten-free FOR NOW.

Once you have your results, you can decide where you’ll go from there, based on your findings.

My main reasons for deciding to give this a go was because I had been feeling SUPER bloated lately, my anxiety had been rather high, my brain fog was quite dense, and studies have shown gluten can have an effect on all of the above.

So I figured, WHAT THE HECK!?  I’m curious.  Let’s do this.

But remember, I hadn’t stepped on a scale since April of 2021!

And although YES, the way I felt was the biggest factor in going forward with the experiment, I also wanted number data.

Whatever would I do!?

Enter… brilliant husband.

HE had the idea to take down my weight and measurements, and I wouldn’t see them.

And yes…

As someone who likes to be in control of the situation..

This was difficult and terrifying!

But it was a solution to the problem, and a great one at that!

And talk about accountability!

Because I knew he knew my numbers, and would most definitely be checking again in a few weeks, it kept me extremely committed to my three-week long experiment.

From May 1st to May 21st, I tried my very best to be gluten-free.

Now, there were a few days where some gluten slipped in, but the majority of the time, I remained on point.

Here’s what I found…

For one, it’s not that hard to be gluten-free!

There are SO MANY OPTIONS including lots of natural ones, and we got to experiment with some super yummy, new recipes.

Ya know what, though?!

I didn’t feel great!

I almost felt MORE anxious, had tons of stomach issues, and felt more lethargic.

I can honestly say, I personally feel better with gluten in my diet.

Now, I had experimented with this in the past, but all I remembered was that I had less bloat, and this took place at a time where being skinny was of utmost importance.

As far as the number data goes…

I lost 6.1 pounds and 9.75 total inches in 21 days.

Now, although I know these differences, I still have no idea what my actual weight and measurements were, and I don’t want to know.

I do not believe however that restricting gluten was the cause of these number dips.

Here’s what I truly believe:

  1. We were eating out less, and cooking more at home.
  2. I was choosing healthier and more nutritious options; even when eating out.
  3. I was eating less processed foods.
  4. I was drinking less alcohol.
  5. I was back to my early morning workouts, and remained consistent with what I was doing.

Healthier choices all around and consistent movement, Monday-Friday, are what I believe were the true reasons for the decrease in weight and inches.

Now, these were MY findings, and they happened in just a few short weeks that were going to pass whether I experimented or not.

If you have a suspicion gluten is affecting you, or anything for that matter, I encourage you to try an experiment!

I find three weeks is plenty of time to get a good feel for how the foods are affecting me, but feel free to do less or more. Cater it to your own body and its needs.

I’d be curious to see what you find.

The truth is, it’s easy to blame dairy, gluten, or carbs for lack of weight loss or how we feel, but for many of us, it simply comes down to the choices we’re making.

I had to laugh while eating out one night and being in awe of how much less bloated I felt without gluten…

When I also had to face the fact that I ordered salmon and broccoli as opposed to my typical at this particular restaurant; a juicy loaded burger and fries.

If you DO decide to experiment, make sure you’re doing it because it’s something you want to do, and not because someone else is saying it’s the best.

Everyone has opinions, but they do not know YOUR body.  You do.

Also… make sure it’s because you want to feel great, and not solely to have that “summer bod” or to be “skinny”.

I have been “skinny” quite a few times throughout my life, and I have to tell you, I’ve never felt better in my body, mind or soul than when I’m eating what my body truly wants until I’m satisfied; even if that means I have some extra meat on my bones.

If you ever want guidance or are looking for a Health or Life Coach…

Never hesitate to reach out!

You have my word; I promise to never push you into anything!

So don’t be afraid to send me a message, and start a chat if coaching has ever interested you.

I’m more than happy to answer your questions.

You can also find, follow, and/or message me @pacifythechaos on Instagram.

Experiment with different foods, listen to your body, and learn to love the way you’re beautifully made.

Life is too short to feel anything but good.